Introspective

When I was coming home from the hospital last February, from my struggle with Guillain-Barré Syndrome, this song came on the radio. I couldn't sing it, due to the damage caused by the ventilation tubes, but I could feel it. I felt every word of it... and I cried.

Over the past year, the meaning of this song has not changed for me, and it holds a special place in the emotional recesses of my heart. Some days I hear it and it makes me truly happy, knowing that my eyes are open and I can see and feel all the love around me. Other days, it's more of a comfort when I'm down and feeling lost. That's how I feel today. Lost. I feel rejected. I don't want to feel this way but I do and sometimes I wonder what I've done to deserve this ache.

So for today, this song (which is the intro song on my blog) will be my comfort. Tomorrow, I hope that it will signal my return to feeling better again. If you have the time, take a moment to listen...

February Song

Where is that old friend gone
Lost in a February song
Tell him it won't be long
Til he opens his eyes,

Where is that simple day
Before colors broke into shades
And how did I ever fade
Into this life, into this life


And I never want to let you down
Forgive me if I slip away


When all that I've known is lost and found
I promise you I, I'll come back to you
One day...


Morning is waking up
Sometimes it's more than just enough
And all that you need to love
Is in front of your eyes,
It's in front of your eyes.

And I never want to let you down
Forgive me if I slip away


Sometimes it's hard to find my ground
'Cause I keep on falling, as I try to get
away from this crazy world...


And I never want to let you down
Forgive me if I slip away

When all that I've known is lost and found
I promise you I, I'll come back to you
One day

Where is that old friend gone
Lost in a February song
Tell him it won't be long
Til he opens his eyes, opens his eyes.

Josh Groban
Awake 2006